Dog Breakfast
Once there lived a mad computer whiz. His whole life was dedicated to the study of neural network. And the more he studied it, the more convinced he became that the human brain was incapable of producing such genius as Mozart's symphonies, Ramayana, Invention of glue and crayons etc. I mean, have you ever seen the human brain? What was it but something very similar to a dog's breakfast? He believed that there was a supercomputer located somewhere beyond the reach of human beings, maybe in the center of earth. It was the supercomputer that gave them ideas so that humans would always be busy doing something useless like inventing and discovering stuffs. Hence, some people who communicated with this supercomputer were smart and others would cross roads when the traffic signal was still green.
In order to confirm his theories, he would visit the local mortuary and graves and bribe his way to obtain a brain sample each day. He would put it in a Kentucky Fried Chicken Box and bring it to office every day. Thus leading his peers and bosses to believe that he had just obtained a humungous appetite for KFC. So voluptious appetite that he did not care to share it with them and would eat it in locked rooms.
But the whiz never cared for the other's thoughts on his KFC craze. He would, in his locked room, dissect the brain and check each and every part of the dog's breakfast in order to get some clue. After months of KFC craze, the scientist finally found a clue.
There was a small organ located on one side of the brain. What use was this organ but as a transmitter? It did not help in any way with the functioning of the brain Also this organ did not exist in some people. People who were stupid did not posses this organ. But genius's belong to Mensa club had these organs very developed and large. What better proof for the existence of the mythical supercomputer?
He was ecstatic and just had to celebrate his discovery. He dreamt that he was winning the Nobel Prize. He went to the bar and had a few rounds of drinks and then went onto the top of the building and jumped from it, killing himself.
While sitting in the bar, it had struck him that such a notion of a supercomputer could only have been put into his head by the supercomputer itself. What use of a Nobel Prize for a prize that he did not deserve?
(adapted from TimeQuake - Kurt Vonnegut)
Once there lived a mad computer whiz. His whole life was dedicated to the study of neural network. And the more he studied it, the more convinced he became that the human brain was incapable of producing such genius as Mozart's symphonies, Ramayana, Invention of glue and crayons etc. I mean, have you ever seen the human brain? What was it but something very similar to a dog's breakfast? He believed that there was a supercomputer located somewhere beyond the reach of human beings, maybe in the center of earth. It was the supercomputer that gave them ideas so that humans would always be busy doing something useless like inventing and discovering stuffs. Hence, some people who communicated with this supercomputer were smart and others would cross roads when the traffic signal was still green.
In order to confirm his theories, he would visit the local mortuary and graves and bribe his way to obtain a brain sample each day. He would put it in a Kentucky Fried Chicken Box and bring it to office every day. Thus leading his peers and bosses to believe that he had just obtained a humungous appetite for KFC. So voluptious appetite that he did not care to share it with them and would eat it in locked rooms.
But the whiz never cared for the other's thoughts on his KFC craze. He would, in his locked room, dissect the brain and check each and every part of the dog's breakfast in order to get some clue. After months of KFC craze, the scientist finally found a clue.
There was a small organ located on one side of the brain. What use was this organ but as a transmitter? It did not help in any way with the functioning of the brain Also this organ did not exist in some people. People who were stupid did not posses this organ. But genius's belong to Mensa club had these organs very developed and large. What better proof for the existence of the mythical supercomputer?
He was ecstatic and just had to celebrate his discovery. He dreamt that he was winning the Nobel Prize. He went to the bar and had a few rounds of drinks and then went onto the top of the building and jumped from it, killing himself.
While sitting in the bar, it had struck him that such a notion of a supercomputer could only have been put into his head by the supercomputer itself. What use of a Nobel Prize for a prize that he did not deserve?
(adapted from TimeQuake - Kurt Vonnegut)
posted by Rivas at 7:46 PM
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